How Decisiveness, Honesty & Experience Combine for Effectiveness in Talking to Girls

In order to do well with girls, you need to be able to let go of what others think of you. In doing so, your confidence will grow, because low confidence partly engenders from being too concerned with the judgements of others. This letting go comes from acting freely, which in the realm of approaching girls, means acting on your initial desire or instinct to approach, rather than calculating the perfect move (calculating engenders from concern of what others think).

Being able to go in on your initial desire is a form of communicative honesty, and this often disarms the girl and others in the environment from responding negatively to your advancement.

Girls and others in the environment prefer this kind of decisive honesty over a man waiting for the perfect move because the former indicates confidence and a man’s personal sense of high status. When a man feels good about himself, he’s likely to act more freely, be more honest in his intent, and have better intentions. Therefore, people feel disarmed and open to his social, emotional or sexual advancement.

However, while this will allow the girl and others to feel open to the man, it doesn’t mean this will allow the girl to be closed by him — being able to close requires tactfulness and skill on the man’s part — which comes from experience. And experience comes from trial and error.

Girls want you to be decisive, honest, open and vulnerable — but also want you to be experienced and know what to do — rather than not knowing what to do, being naïve, unsure, and clunky.

They do not want you to know what to do in a calculating, very strategic, agenda-ridden sense — but rather want you to know what to do instinctively. Girls want you to have no agenda, but still…want you to have a latent agenda that you’re operating from that possess the intent to close her — which is based on experience, and which you use to instinctively and humanistically improvise from while you create the social, emotional and sexual experience for her and you — to the close.

They want to know you and where you are emotionally at this moment, and this comes from approaching with decisiveness and honesty, which forces you to act instinctively and directly — showcasing your honest emotions and sense of self. 

They also want you to be experienced — knowing how to handle a girl, her emotions, her sexual needs, and her psychology. They don’t want to feel you have an agenda. They don’t want a calculating, overly strategic man. They want him to be having fun, remaining disarmed himself. But, in order for the man to make the close happen, he needs to operate on a latent agenda that is strongly interwoven with fun, and a freedom from outcome (a lack of concern for how the interaction ends up [sex or no sex, etc]).

Girls want this latent agenda to be instinctive and humanistic (the behavior of a benevolent, functioning, experienced man), rather than detached and calculating (the behavior of a low-status, low-functioning, desperate man).